serviceindustrynight.net

What up, peeps?

We actually got together on Friday to do this but there was just too much distraction going on for us to ever get anywhere. Fortunately we were able to pick up again on Saturday and put one out.

This week:

Yesterday was an abortion. Too much shiny shit for Freak.
Freak’s fucking secretary day.
Wood’s a neat freak and a dumbass.
How to destroy a nice pair of earbuds.
Crackdown! Crackdown! Crackdown!
SMODCast! Lunchbox and Snowball stole our bit.
Crackdown: It doesn’t suck!
BBG: producing but she really wants to star.
Spanky and protecting identities.
Happy St. Pat’s.
Freak’s Mom and Freak’s Dad, a.k.a. The Butcher Pimp.
Playing Crackdown upside-down: Blame Angry Johnny.
Dan. Fucking. Savage.
Learning to Love Your Low Libido. Fuck that shit.
Open a bar in Vegas. It’s like printing money.
Golden Tee: things that go thump in the bar.
Minigolf for grown-ups and drunks. And grown-up drunks.
Frank’s dad, Pol Pot, Idi Amin, and Saddam Hussein.
Agility orbs: it’s just like Super Mario 64.
Who would you have a threesome with?
If you haven’t figured it out yet, we like Crackdown.
Shout out to Noodle.
Freak in the Magic Kingdom.
The Disney Memorial Orgy Print.
Crackdown. Again. Sorry.
Freak’s nascent hiphop career.
Meeting chicks at the punk show.
*If anyone knows anything about Perturbed, a Vegas punk band that is now defunct, please write in!
The perfect wrap and Freak fucks it all up.
This week’s outro music: Souvenier quand tu nous tiens from Jamendo.com (I’ll put a link up to the artist when Freak sends me one)

Write in! Tell us what you liked and what you didn’t. We had a discussion yesterday about the old intro/outro again. Freak has always been of the opinion that we’ll be fine, me, not so much. I’ve been kind of nervous about copyrighted material. But then I got a listen to SMODCast and started thinking: if those dudes can play entire fucking songs, with the only saving grace being that they talk all over them, well…

You let me know what you think: should we bring back the old catalog and go back to the original intro and outro? I liked them a lot but I’m also kind of enjoying making Freak do something creative. Use the contact info on the right. Leave us a voicemail with Gizmo, (hint: use GizmoCall if you’re not ready to install VOIP software on your computer—our ID is serviceindustrynight). Subscribe with RSS or in iTunes with the links provided or, as always, use the direct download enclosure link below.

Technorati Tags: casino, drinking, drugs, funny, gaming, geek, Mac, podcast

Ah-ite bitches, before you go believin everything that tubby fucker puts down on paper, as it were, you need the truth(…can’t handle the truth?) which can only be properly dispensed here: The most recent podcast up was SUPPOSED to be titled “The Grateful Escort of the UFC Queen, and I AM NOT a friends whore. Thoroughly enjoyed the show, don’t get me wrong, but I am by no means a whore. Now a SCRUBS whore? Guilty. Hell, watchin it right now, but the only reason Friends even came up is because I referenced it in regards to naming our show. Friends always did the ‘ the one where such and such happened ‘, though considering what we DID name the show, I struggle to see the relevance of bringing friends up at all, except to take a cheap-shot at your boy here. And as for HIS newfound fascination with scrubs, ask him who REALLY turned him onto it. ANYHOW….I digress(as if THAT will surprise anyone.) The Newest show is by far my favorite of the new season. So far. We will be getting’em out more regularly, so hang in there loyal fan. Both of you, and you, Mr. Anonymous.

So, I am in day 3 of my 9 day vacation, and it’s rolling along nicely, if not entirely too quickly. Last night after we kicked Wood’s lame ass out of our house, BBG and I got our tipsy on, and had nasty sex in no less than 4 places in our humble home, including but not limited to: the stairs, the couch, the kitchen counter, etc, etc…..All in all a good night. I flopped onto the couch for a breather and a head-on fan shot( NOT a sex thing) afterwards, and BBG left me to rot and went to bed without me. I assed out listening to chill-ass easy listening music and woke up nude and shivering round 2am. Good times, good times…..

Yeah, anyhow, today was nice too. Got up late, went to breakfast, did a little clothes-buying for the missus on my credit card( big fun ) and then we went to the cinema to see 300! Except, she didn’t want to SEE 300. She did in fact, wanna see Zodiac. Not terrible, but weighed on a scale with 300, how close can you get with a 3 hour slow mover about a story that’s nearly 30 years old in which all the facts were already known? The answer, not very. Nah, it was okay, but amidst everyone I know sending me text msgs about how FUCKING AWESOME 300 is, WHILE I’m sitting in the theater watching Zodiac, it kinda hurt a little. That’s okay. I’ll have my day in the sun. In the meantime, do yourself a favor and check out our newest offering and drop us a line, eh? I’m such a whore……..

FrEaK

PS

Big shout-out to our boy NooDle

Update: Upon reflection, I came to the conclusion that we dropped a couple of names we shouldn’t have dropped, so in the interest of avoiding gang rape by high-powered attorneys the latest show has been pulled and re-cut. We do not have, nor have we ever had, any information that might implicate any casino owner for solicitation of prostitutes and did not mean to imply that we did. We sincerely apologize.

You’ll notice that there are some gaps in the audio as a result. To those of you who’ve already downloaded the show I would take it as a personal favor if you would delete it and re-download the new cut. And don’t bother with the blackmail angle. We’s already po’ enough. Oh, and I fixed the title. That Freak is such a whiny bitch.

It’s a strange thing to call a show, I know, but we’re still trying to figure out this whole numbering scheme. Since we’ve been watching a lot of Scrubs lately and Freak’s a big Friends whore he had the idea to free associate the title. If you can bring yourself to listen it will become clearer, trust me.

This episode includes:

Disneyland.
Wheels for the truck.
Talking about doing interviews.
Freak’s buddy the call-girl dispatcher.
Prostitute trading cards and hooker ads.
Prop 215: weed by prescription! California rocks!
Tweakazz in da hood.
We are so sober. Sorry.
Wood’s going to 300. Freak has to see Zodiac (HA ha.)
Back to weed.
Remember: always put in a doggie door so you can break in when you get evicted.
Grandpa Ken’s poor little car.
Voyeurism in the garage.
TV talk this week: Heroes, Lost, Alias, 90201 (wtf?)
The Grateful Dead traveling open-air drug and grilled cheese market.
How to smoke weed when you got to round up the shopping carts.
Dude’s not gay until you catch him smoking a pole.
UFC: Coture kicks Silvia’s seven foot tall doughy ass.
Wrap up and we’re out!

And some other stuff I probably didn’t get in the show notes because Freak was blasting the stereo while I was trying to play back. And BBG came home and decided to flirt with me, which never helps. It’s embarrassing how much that woman wants me.

FYI, we’re now using

Twice now, in fact. And the next time it comes up on the ballot I’m gonna vote for it again. What am I planning to vote for? Marijuana, the wonder drug.

For more information regarding legislative efforts to legalize marijuana visit NORML or The Marijuana Policy Project.

Crossposted to Oceanside, Nevada

Technorati Tags: liberty, marijuana, medicine, politics, science

No, really! Check it out!

Looks like the stars finally aligned, schedules finally synced up and yours truly finally got off their lazy asses to put another one in the can for you good folks. We do have to plead just a little bit of laziness with this one, though. What you’re getting is the realization of a long held desire to do a sound-seeing tour of one of the hottest joints in town, The Palms.

Our tour starts out in the casino as we meet McGyver (aka Raven 7), an old buddy who gives us an all access tour of rooms that you’ll never see (and if you do, drop us a line because we want to know you, perhaps even in the biblical sense).

So sit back, relax and enjoy an hour of Wood and Freak kickin’ it interior design fag style. If you listen closely you might even catch one or the other of us getting outed with (gasp) real names.

We’re serious about coming back in a big way, so if you don’t want to miss a bit of the fun you can subscribe with anything that parses RSS with enclosures by clicking the links to subscribe either with your feed reader or in iTunes. As always you can download the show via the enclosure link below.

P.S. Just to let you all know, I’ve been working on this since yesterday morning. Posting the podcast, that is. For some reason Blogware simply refused to accept my post, no matter what I did, until it was damned good and ready to accept it. Sharp-eyed readers will notice some changes to the contact/subscribe portion of the right sidebar. I know it looks a bit wonky but Firefox, for some odd reason, absolutely refuses to show the custom badges for the RSS, email, and iTunes links. Safari shows ‘em just fine. After fucking with it almost all day I finally just made two links for each: a badge and a text link. I hate html.

Technorati Tags: podcast

War on Drugs, my hairy white ass.

Crossposted to Oceanside, Nevada

Wussup Bitches?! Sorry I’ve been away for so long, but I forgot my password. Anyway, there’s all kinds of new shit a’comin, so don’t lose heart, Planeteers! New in my world? Well, for starters, I have a new love interest! No, BBG and I have not parted ways, though with my newfound love she may reconsider. I recently purchased a 42″ LCD flat panel tv, AND an XBOX 360! You can’t TEAR me away from my lazyboy! In fact, just minutes ago, Wood and I completed Gears of War in a Co-Op online campaign. This was my first ( second if you count the half hour yesterday) online gaming expirience, and I loved it! I am a late bloomer. It was great, being able to hang out w Wood and not wear pants, and consequently not have him constantly oogling my package out of jealousy. I may have to just go ahead and pay the fifty bucks for the XBOX live Gold account. Damn it. Also in the category of new, Wood and I are getting the band back together! The show is returning in all it’s splendor very soon! In fact, we recorded a tentative first show back the other night using Woody’s newest toy, a little microphone hook-up dealy for his nano. I’m sure he’ll elaborate and give up all the technical data that I don’t ever pay any attention to. Where did we use this little portable recording studio? At the Palms Hotel & Casino, whilst we toured some of the super suites with our old pal and friend of the show, Macguyver! he’s a manager in the engineering department, and he took us on quite a spin. I don’t wanna spoil any of the exciting show points, but we have about an hour of material along with some photographical documentation that should be up on the blog here soon. Hmmm…what else? I’ve noticed that our readership has fallen off, and that’s our fault, what with our being idle for so long, but hey, we’re back! So get your friends and their friends and get our numbers back up! We are gonna be able to put out a very respectable product this go-round. Wood has reworked his career and has incredibly flexible hours now, and I have outfitted my home with a wireless internet network, so we can now record our show at more times in more places. Also, Woodrow has some new software to try out for recording, and we are both very excited. PLUS, I have been amassing a whole slew of new and retarded adventures to recount for you, so please, faithful readers, stay with us ! If you do, I’ll be your best friend. Thanks again, and don’t forget to rub yourself daily.

I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married.

My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister.

My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear.

It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn’t overcome and didn’t really want to overcome.

She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn’t say a word.

She said, “I’m going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me.” I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me.

I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside.

With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, “We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn’t ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.

The moral of this story is: “Always keep your condoms in your car.”

Via Via Sxxxy.org

Technorati Tags: chicks, funny, NSFW, sex

As I get older, I find myself feeling less of an attachment to Christmas every year. Maybe it’s the commercialism, or the fake religiosity or the stupid psychotic contortions we put ourselves through. When I want or need something, I go get it. Simple, right? But no, not at Christmas time. Christmas means having to wait to see if your loved ones know you well enough to get you what you want. And then going and buying it anyway if they don’t.

Bah.

This year, however, I’ve found a new message for Christmas, one that does away with all of the nonsense and cuts straight to the heart of what the season should be all about.

Unbridled kinky sex.

Via SugarBank and Goodie Bag TV

P.S. Mrono brought to my attention that the banner doesn’t seem to be showing up in Firefox. It shows up in other browsers, namely Safari and IE and I hadn’t changed anything so I’m thinking it’s a Firefox issue. I did update the code to match my banner for my other blog, which is working just fine, so I’m stumped. If anyone has any suggestions, I’m all ears.

Technorati Tags: atheism, funny, holiday, nsfw, sex, video, youtube

It’s an old saw that what’s most important during the holidays, namely the people that surround us, those family and friends without whom the holidays would have little meaning. Take, for example, my good friend Freak who texted me this morning to let me know that a major name consumer electronics retailer (whom I will not identify) was holding a holiday promotion. The deal is this: the first 2000 people to call (888) 244-3425 would receive a $200 gift card, perfect for helping out with that tight holiday budget.

I just want to say thanks to Freak for remembering me during this busy holiday season.